More...

Tonight I cried myself to sleep from the wanting more... more peace, more of me to go around, more energy to say yes when Princess Sunshine Buttercup asks me to read to her, or when Princess Me Too says in her sweet baby way, "pawk, pawk."

It was one of those days, only it seems those days keep coming in, like waves crashing the shore during a storm. I want to be a better Mom. I want to do homework with the big girls without frustration biting the edge of my voice, because dinner needs to be made, baby needs attention, laundry needs doing, and the garbage is over flowing. Not to mention, we need to leave for dance or Girl Scouts in about 5 minutes, and someone lost a shoe. We are always rushing it seems. The threat of lateness looming heavy on my head. My old mantra of one foot in front of the other isn't cutting it right now. The waves keep coming. I need a break in the action. Some time to come up for air. Thank God Thanksgiving break is coming. We'll be traveling, but at least it'll be a different kind of busy, that'll include some real ocean waves, and maybe a bit of snow. We'll be with family, and someone else will be cooking. All of which, I am already thankful for.

So, for today, I will be adding just breathe to my one foot in front of the other, and will pray for grace to cover the rest.

Peace. {exhale}

This is how we do it...

Truth be told, I was not feeling "it" this weekend. Didn't even need a costume to be scary because I was grumpy and short tempered all week. But, then this happened...



And, it pulled me out of my funk. Love watching Little Miss Me, too get in on the action. Love how the big girls totally knew the drill this year. Carve the jagged top, scoop the guts, save the seeds. They were even reciting lines from It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown. Made me smile. So proud. Definitely ready for the big night now.

Speaking of...

How cute are they? The Librarian (her idea all the way), The Pumpkin, and Her Highness, Princess Peach.









I heard a statistic that put Halloween second only to Christmas on the Big Ten of Holidays. Surprising, and yet, not at the same time. There's nothing in particular that is celebrated by the costumes or the going door to door, giving and receiving candy. But then again maybe there is. Maybe it is the celebration of being with family and friends. The celebration of community. Of knocking on a neighbor's door for the first time all year. Of holding your little one's hand through the crisp night air of Fall. Soaking up the thrill of it all. At least that is how we do it.

Tuff question...

I hate the expression, "Everything happens for a reason." Truly horrible things happen all the time. Things that are so evil there is little a person can do but wall off a piece of themselves and look the other way. It is nearly impossible to wrap my mind around the reality of what evil happens to people, all around the world, every day. All manner of hate, murder, torture, rape, neglect, lies, greed, perversion, pride, violence, sickness, disease. Acts of malice perpetrated against young and old, rich and poor, good and evil alike. What reason is there to be found in the rape and murder of women and little girls, babies even? What purpose is there when orphans are left in solitude, neglected to the point of death? The way in which we humans torture and abuse one another are seemingly endless. And, so often it seems that evil begets even more evil. How then can it be said that all these things happen for a reason? I suppose it is something to say when words fail but are all you have to offer in the face of evil. Words that make it just a bit easier to live behind the walls we build to keep the darkness from overwhelming our souls. But I find no hope in this idea of trying to find a reason to explain why someone's mind can become so warped with evil that they act out atrocious, vile, acts of violence against another person. Saying there must be a reason implies a certain responsibly. Is a person somehow responsible for what is inflicted upon them? Is God? No. Evil exists. It is pervasive. It's vile fingers touch all our lives. Some more cruelly than others. It makes me sick. It seeks only destruction. It's purpose is only death. However, on the other side of this is redemption. I do not believe there is always a reason why evil happens. I do, however, believe in the power of love. In the power of redemption. When evil happens, Love is still there. Love is always greater, and the effects of evil are always offered redemption. Over and over again until restoration is fulfilled. Until what has been destroyed is made right. Until wounds so horrific are healed with truth and grace. In this is true hope.

Road Trip....

Let me just say that, I love my life. I love my husband. I love my girls. I love our home. But, I have to admit that after so many days of the same day in day out routine, of time when my husband must leave us so often to go do work that not many can do, a girl just needs a change of scene. You know what I mean??? When those times come, the best cure is a road trip! That's right. I said it. R-O-A-D T-R-I-P. Now, I love a good road trip. I just love the whole get out of dodge feeling I get when we leave the streets of our wonderful little town that are familiar with memories of growing up here. Those same streets whose there's-nothing-to-do-here boredom as a teenager I wanted to escape from, but whose charm and quaintness make me feel lucky to live here now. Still, it feels so good to roam someone else's neck of the woods, wondering what life is like among their streets. And what memories are held dear by the people who live there. Love it! So, we packed up our stuff, and hit the road.


Our fearless leader diving the entire 3000 miles (round trip) by himself. Love you, honey...




The view from my seat...




We made a point of visiting Grandpa on our journey, and got to see our cousin, too!



It was fun and so good to see the girls laughing and playing with their cousin as if 1600 miles didn't separate them.






Three kids, six states, eleven days...Not bad, huh? We camped some, stayed in hotels some, visited too far away family, and had a lot of fun seeing just a small part, really, of this amazing country of ours. Just what I needed- a concentrated together-time, family adventure.

Coming soon and a call to action...

We just got home from a two week road trip to Colorado, and are trying to quickly settle back in in time for school tomorrow. (Tomorrow? Really? Crazy) More on that and our trip to come. But in the mean time...

I have a friend who is in the process of of adopting a child from Ethiopia. A little boy who will join a sweet family of three beautiful daughters and one handsome boy, plus two very inspiring parents. She is selling jewelry and coffee on her website to help raise funds to cover the cost of the adoption. The necklaces are handmade in Africa. Please check out her blog, and help support this dear family. Thanks, Christie.

http://www.chuckndabs.blogspot.com/

Summertime {and the living is easy} ...

Summertime...that magical season when time itself used to slow to a crawl, and warm sun soaked days eased into cool violet hued evenings. When life brimmed to overflowing with the ease of good friends and family fun. Growing up, summertime meant running across the yard, jumping through the sprinkler as it's arch ticked from one side to the next, stray pieces of grass sticking to your feet as you slipped through the spray again and again. This summer I get to witness the joys of summer through the eyes of my girls.



There is something so satisfying in knowing that some things never change. Like the fact that all any kid really needs to enjoy the magic of summer is sunshine and a hose. You know what they say...you can lead a kid to water and they will play for hours, having the time of their lives.








The laughter and giggles, priceless. I wonder if my own parents relished the same sense of the timelessness of summer fun. Because, as a kid, I never looked beyond the moment. I never wondered when it would end. I just soaked it all in with an insatiable appetite for more.


In these sweet, freckled faces I recognize that same hungry appetite, and it is good!

Silence...

Everyday this blog swirls in the back of my mind. Words unformed waiting to be put to page. Yet, here I sit and not sure what to write that won't sound like a status report of the comings and goings of our family. That'd be really boring. Add to that the fact that I have been feeling like a slug lately, and this girl has not much to say. I'm actually feeling like I am in need of a good Haagen Dazs meets Steel Magnolias and a bubble bath kind of night. The kind of night where all the hazy, indescribable junk that is circling around in my head, weighing my inspiration and motivation down like a ton of bricks, can roll down my cheeks as Sally Fields unloads her grief on her friends in the cemetery. Who needs therapy when you can watch sappy movies and eat ice cream? Lord knows, ice cream can fix just about anything.